People Often Ask – The spectrum of orientations (e.g., gay, lesbian, bisexual, asexual, pansexual)
People Often Ask
Can your period or hormones change your sexual orientation?
Your hormones can crank the volume up or down on your libido, but they do not create or erase an orientation. During your cycle, estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone rise and fall:- Around **ovulation**, high estrogen and a bump in testosterone can make you feel extra horny or more socially bold.- During **PMS/luteal phase**, high then crashing progesterone can make you irritable, anxious, and less interested in sex.- On your **period**, low hormones can mean low energy and lower desire – or sometimes a weird mix of pain and comfort-craving.Those shifts may make you *notice* different attractions more or less intensely at different times, but the underlying pattern – who you’re drawn to over months and years – is your orientation. If sudden changes feel extreme or scary, that’s a reason to check in with a provider, not to doubt your queerness.
Is it normal for your sexuality label to change over time?
Yes. Completely normal, especially for women and AFAB people who grew up under compulsory heterosexuality. Many people move through labels like straight → bi → queer, or bi → lesbian, or no label → pan, as they get more space, safety, and experience. That doesn’t mean any previous identity was “fake.” It means you finally had enough data – emotional, relational, and yes, hormonal stability – to name what was already there.Your menstrual cycle, trauma history, meds, and mental health can all affect how clearly you feel your desires at different stages of life. As those change, your language might too. Treat labels like phone updates, not courtroom verdicts: use what works now, update when it stops fitting.
How do I know if I’m demisexual, bisexual, or just repressed?
Look at *how* attraction shows up, not how “experienced” you are. If you:- Rarely feel sexual attraction, but when you do it’s after deep emotional connection → demisexual might fit.- Regularly feel sexual or romantic pull toward more than one gender, even if you’ve never acted on it → bisexual or pansexual might be your lane.- Feel shut down, numb, or scared around sex because of shame, religious messaging, or trauma → repression is in the mix, and you deserve support.Your cycle can blur this: PMS, pain, or hormonal birth control can shut desire down; ovulation can spike it. Track patterns over a few months. If attraction is *always* low but emotional closeness sometimes unlocks a bit of sexual interest, demisexual is worth exploring. Therapy can help untangle repression from orientation – you don’t have to solve it alone.
Do I have to tell my doctor my sexual orientation?
You don’t owe anyone your label, but telling a provider can actually protect your health. Knowing whether you have sex with men, women, nonbinary people, or no one helps them:- Offer the right STI testing.- Discuss birth control realistically (or confirm you don’t need it).- Screen appropriately for pregnancy risk.- Understand how stress about identity or discrimination might affect your cycle, pain, or mental health.You can set boundaries: “I’m queer, I have one partner, we use barriers, I don’t want to discuss details beyond that.” If a provider is judgmental or dismissive, that’s a them problem – and a green light to find someone else. Your body deserves care that respects both your health and your identity.If you’re sitting with more questions, trying to decode your patterns, or just wondering if what your body is doing is normal, you don’t have to white-knuckle it alone. Bring your questions, your cycle charts, your confusion, and your rage to Gush and let someone walk through it with you – no shame, no performance, just real talk.
