The Power Behind Women's Growing Desire to Decenter Men
Gen Z and millennial women have been challenging the norms that have dictated their lives for a hot minute.
Now, the 4B movement is fueling the fire, going full-force into decentering men altogether.
Women are focused on refocusing, driven by the realization that their worth is not tethered to the men around them.
We’ve been fed myths that suggest our happiness and security depend on male validation—and it’s only left us feeling empty and unsure.
It’s time to dismantle these fabrications and harness our collective empowerment for personal freedom.
The Illusion of Male-Centric Validation
The historical entanglement of women’s value with male approval runs deep—much deeper than many are willing to consider, let alone accept or change.
From culture to government to religion, we have been taught to pursue the attention and approval of men above all else. Even some of the goals and desires we think are not influenced by male approval point to clues proving otherwise, like
The real problem is expecting external validation from any one source, and it’s even worse when it’s supposed to be from
Women all over the world are becoming more aware of this unfortunate truth, working to honor their inherent self-worth and refocus their energy, time, and resources into themselves.
Decentering men is more than rejecting traditional roles. It’s a commitment to reclaiming your autonomy.
The Possibilities of Prioritizing Yourself
Choosing yourself can be the most rebellious and rewarding act of all.
Studies show that mental health improves when women prioritize self-care and personal goals over societal expectations.
Men have been conditioned to prioritize themselves, their wants, and their needs above all, while women are conditioned to pursue a relationship above all. How convenient.
That’s just one reason to explore the possibilities of living for yourself instead of chasing expectations and empty promises of an idealized romance.
What if your dreams and career consistently came first for once? Not in a “girl boss” way, but a genuine self-investment way. You could write a book, learn a new skill, face your fear of public speaking, and so much more—but you’ll never know unless you go all in!
Real strength and confidence comes from solitude and doing more of your favorite things. If you’re not sure where to start, it can be as simple as tapping into your inner child.
What hobbies, activities, or things bring you joy when you even just think about them? Sometimes that’s the quickest way to get back to your true self.
At the end of the day, you will never regret the effort you put into your growth and finding ways to make yourself proud.
Finding and Creating Female Reinforcement
Across cities and college campuses, women are forming communities that reflect their values and redefine their lives.
This is why girlhood and sisterhood are so important. Reframing the concept of family into a chosen network can help uplift you to see beyond traditional expectations, especially if your family or home life has been less than ideal.
Women are actively choosing to build healthy, reciprocal friendships over temporary romantic pursuits that drain them—and you can too.
Inspiration is everywhere. Learn from women entrepreneurs and changemakers who have successfully decentered men to pursue their aspirations. Seek female mentors who lead unorthodox lives; women who travel, women with interesting jobs, women who live peaceful lives.
They will show you how to replace the old, unhelpful narratives with empowering insights that are true to you. It may still be frustrating and lonely at times, but it will be worth it in the long run.
Rage against the machine at all costs. But remember: the machine isn’t always male. Sometimes it’s the lie that you need one.
