All About – Cleaning and maintaining sex toys to prevent infections
Sex toys don’t automatically wreck your vaginal pH, but sloppy cleaning, scented products, and sharing without barriers can push you toward BV, yeast, or irritation—especially at more vulnerable points in your cycle or during your period. With good hygiene, barriers, and attention to patterns, you can keep toys in your life without trashing your vaginal ecosystem.
What’s the most lowkey/affordable way to get tested (no judgment, minimal awkwardness), and can I do it without it showing up on my parents’ insurance?
Low-cost, low-awkwardness STI testing is usually hiding in plain sight: campus clinics, Planned Parenthood/Title X sites, health department STI clinics, and community health centers often offer free or sliding-scale tests—and you can self-pay to keep it off your parents’ insurance and EOBs. At‑home kits add privacy but aren’t always cheaper or as comprehensive.
Common questions about oral sex
Rimming, oral during your period, and multiple partners all carry real STI risks, and birth control doesn’t protect you from infections—barriers, testing, and honest communication still matter for oral and anal sex.
If I’m on birth control and we use condoms most of the time, do I still need regular STI tests, and which STIs are we even supposed to be screening for (like, does a “full panel” include everything)?
Birth control prevents pregnancy, not STIs—and using condoms “most of the time” still leaves real risk. If you’re sexually active and under 25, you still need at least yearly screening for chlamydia, gonorrhea, HIV, and syphilis, with more frequent “full panel” testing every 3–6 months if you have new or multiple partners or sometimes skip condoms. A standard full panel doesn’t automatically include herpes tests or throat/anal swabs unless you ask.
For anal sex, what’s the safest setup to avoid STIs (condoms + lube + toys), and how do you handle things like switching from anal to oral/vaginal without accidentally spreading something?
Safest anal sex means a condom on every penis or toy that goes in your butt, lots of lube, and a hard rule that anything that’s been in your anus doesn’t go in your vagina or mouth again without a wash or fresh condom to avoid STIs and bacterial infections.
What’s the best way to store condoms if you live with roommates/parents and want privacy—but also don’t want them to get damaged?
You can keep condoms hidden, safe, and ready without turning your room into a sex shop on display. The trick is storing them cool, dry, dark, and unsquished—while tucking them into low-key spots parents or roommates won’t notice.
If someone says they’re “clean” and had a negative STI test recently, what should I still be asking/looking out for before oral or anal — and how soon after can tests actually catch stuff?
“Clean” isn’t a medical term; it’s not enough before oral or anal. You still need to ask what was tested, when, which body parts were swabbed, and understand window periods where tests can be negative even if someone’s infected.
How do I check if a condom is still safe to use (expiration date, packaging, weird texture) without making it a whole awkward moment?
You can do a full condom safety check in under 10 seconds—and if anything, it makes you look more confident, not awkward. Here’s exactly what to look for in the date, packaging, and texture so you know it’s safe before it goes on.
How often should I actually be getting tested if I’m having sex but not like… a ton of partners—does it change if I’m in a situationship vs an exclusive relationship?
If you’re sexually active (vaginal, oral, or anal), a good baseline is STI testing at least once a year—plus any time you change partners or have a condom slip, break, or “we’ll just skip it this time” moment. Under 25 and in a situationship or not 100% sure it’s exclusive? Every 3–6 months is smarter; once you’re truly mutually monogamous and both tested clean after past partners, yearly is usually enough.
For oral sex, what actually works to prevent STIs (like, are dental dams worth it and how do you use them without it feeling super awkward or killing the vibe)?
Barriers are what actually protect you during oral sex. Condoms for oral on a penis and dental dams for oral on a vulva or anus significantly cut STI risk without killing the vibe when you treat them as part of the performance, not a medical interruption.
Is it actually bad to keep condoms in my purse or car, or is that just a myth—like how long is too long before heat messes them up?
Yes, heat and friction absolutely can mess condoms up—and your car is basically a microwave for latex. Your purse? Sometimes okay. Your hot car for days or weeks? No. Here’s how long is “too long” and how to store them so they actually work.
How to manage allergic reactions to products (e.g., latex, spermicide)
Learn how to tell latex or spermicide allergy from simple irritation, what symptoms mean “stop using this now,” how your cycle and birth control affect reactions, the safest condom and lube alternatives, and how to calm a reaction fast (plus when it’s urgent care serious).
How much lube are you supposed to use and when do you reapply without it getting messy or ruining the vibe—any tips for keeping it cute/discreet (like for hookups or sharing a small space with roommates)?
Think “more than a drop, less than a puddle.” Here’s how much lube to use for vaginal vs anal sex, when to reapply without killing the mood, and stealth tricks for keeping lube cute and discreet around hookups and roommates.
How often should I replace toys or parts (like silicone sleeves, suction cup bases, or shared attachments), and what’s the safest way to store them so they don’t get gross or contaminated?
Non-porous toys can last for years if they stay smooth, non-sticky, and odor-free, while soft or porous parts like sleeves and “real feel” textures usually need replacing every 6–24 months. Always wash, dry fully, and store each toy in its own pouch in a cool, dry place—never toss damp toys together in a dark drawer.
Why do some lubes burn or mess with my pH—what ingredients should I avoid (like glycerin, parabens, fragrance, warming stuff), especially if I’m prone to yeast infections/UTIs?
If lube burns, it’s usually the wrong pH, too harsh, or so concentrated it literally pulls water out of your cells. Here’s how to choose gentle, pH-balanced, glycerin-free formulas and the exact ingredient red flags to avoid if you’re prone to yeast infections or UTIs.
Do I really need a special toy cleaner, or is unscented soap + warm water fine—and what should I avoid (like scented soaps, alcohol, boiling) depending on the material?
For most sex toys, you don’t need a special cleaner—gentle, unscented soap plus warm water is usually safest for non-porous silicone, glass, steel, and hard plastic. Avoid scented soaps, harsh antibacterials, bleach, alcohol, essential oils, and boiling anything with motors or soft/porous materials.
Importance of personal hygiene before and after sex
People often ask if peeing after sex, showering for period sex, or using special “feminine washes” really matter. UTIs, pH changes, and discharge shifts are common—but most prevention comes from simple habits (like peeing after sex and gentle vulva rinsing), not harsh products or over-washing.
How do you bring up hygiene with a partner without it getting weird or feeling like you’re accusing them of being gross—especially if it’s a casual situation?
You’re allowed to want a clean body next to yours. Bringing up hygiene is about boundaries and shared care, not calling someone gross. Use “I” language, tie it to your comfort and health, and normalize quick clean-up or showering together as part of the sexual vibe.
After sex, what hygiene stuff is actually worth doing (peeing, washing, changing underwear, etc.) to help avoid UTIs/yeast infections without accidentally messing up your pH?
Pee within 15–30 minutes after sex, gently rinse your vulva, and change out of damp clothes. That combo actually helps prevent UTIs and irritation without wrecking your vaginal pH—no douching, harsh soaps, or “feminine washes” needed.
Okay real talk: how do I choose between water-based vs silicone vs oil-based lube, and which ones are actually safe with condoms + sex toys?
Water-based lube is the safe default with all condoms and toys, silicone lube is best for long-lasting slip (but usually not with silicone toys), and oil-based options like coconut oil are condom-unsafe and mostly for external play. Here’s how to match each type to your body, your cycle, condoms, and toys.